Difficult conversations are inevitable in any business. The topic comes up a lot with our clients. Whether it’s a performance review, a tough negotiation or resolving conflict, these interactions can be stressful and emotionally draining. However, by approaching these conversations with the right mindset and strategies, you can turn them into opportunities for growth and positive outcomes.

Here are our tips for success

1. Planning and preparation

• Consider the facts of the situation, without emotion. This might be easier said than done. Try looking at the situation as if you were a third party… What would they think, do and say? What advice would you give someone else in this situation?
• Don’t ambush them with the conversation. Tell them in advance that you want to talk and what it’s about – this gives them time to mentally prepare too.
• Think how the other person might feel and plan how to address their concerns. You can’t second-guess everything, but thinking through some of how they might feel will help you to have a more satisfactory conversation and therefore a more satisfactory outcome.
• What is the outcome you are hoping to achieve? Is there a benefit to them or those around them? Considering this might help if you are ‘over-empathising’ to the point you are struggling to have the conversation.
• Find a private, quiet place to create a conducive environment for open and honest communication at a time when you are both available and not rushed. 

2. Keep an open mind

• Start with something you can both agree upon, whether this is the facts, a desire to resolve the situation or the desired outcome.
• Give the other person your undivided attention, let them speak. Repeat what you’ve heard to ensure you have understood correctly. Be curious, ask open questions and most importantly – don’t judge.
• Stay solution-focussed and don’t blame or accuse the other person. Your views might not be their reality. Stay open-minded. Your feelings and perceptions are just that. Be curious as to their perspective.

3. Stay calm and composed

• Take deep breaths and don’t let your emotions control the situation.
• Stay focused on the issue at hand, don’t get defensive or aim to ‘win’ the conversation.
• Use ‘and’ instead of ‘but’ to add to the conversation rather than negate what the other person has said.
• Find areas of agreement to build a foundation for constructive dialogue. Work together to find mutually beneficial solutions.

4. End on a positive note

• Recap the main points discussed, the agreed outcome and what you will both do to achieve the outcome.
• Agree timescales, including how you will know when the issue is resolved.
• Thank the other person for their time and honesty.
• If necessary, schedule a follow-up meeting to discuss further action steps.

Remember, difficult conversations are an opportunity to strengthen relationships and resolve issues. By approaching these conversations with empathy, respect, and a willingness to listen, you can navigate even the toughest challenges effectively.